It's one of those things in life where people size you up and they believe they know your motives in life. We all experience this on a day to day basis. But a conversation with someone I deeply respect gave me some personal insight. We all thing we are some sort of gurus in our own mind and for the most part people equate how why someone is doing something on the way they think. This causes problems. I remember years ago trying to tell someone the truth but their reaction and actions showed they didn't believe me because of an idea stuck in their head. Basically for me this taught me to learn to listen and quiet my mind to what I think. The Bible clearly tells us only God knows the heart and though He might reveal something to us it's only a piece of the puzzle. Most of the problems would be avoided if people would be able to honestly communicate. The majority of people I dealt with in life like to sweep things under the rug and not deal with them. This usually causes an unexpected reaction of some sort that could have been avoided. Even if there is communication we have to try to avoid "translation" (trying to decipher instead of listing to what's communicated) or assumption. If we really trust the person even though it doesn't make sense to our train of though we should try to understand what's going on with them as much as we can. (Granted these tips are for people who want real relationships and not superficial ones.) A relationship like a marriage is work and must be cultivated. Everything else is just a facade that will fall apart as soon as somebody doesn't get what they want from you. My best relationships have survived distance, drastic life changes and trials of life. They are usually based on who you are and not what you do.
-Shamik
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