2012 In a Nutshell

Back at the beginning of 2008 I was broken. I was heading to West Virginia after a business failure, a church closing (which I worked for) and the death of my music mentor and friend the Christmas Eve of 2007. The last thing I needed is all the ensued in 2008 because emotionally I just didn't care anymore. I just wanted a peaceful life. Not the press of "Church". I went to the International House of Prayer that year and something happened in one of the rooms. God showed up. Even the other people who were not staff in the room started weeping and praying over me. It was something I only shared with Freddy and may never share with anyone else. It was the truth that hit me to the core with a response from God I wasn't used to. This made me go deeper in the Bible to find out who God is for myself. This is what laid the foundation for 2012. The last few years have been years of healing for me. People will never fully understand what happened to me between 2005-2007. I'm just starting to understand myself. What has ensued is a stripping of religious ideals I just accepted from "authorities" in Christianity and never researched for myself. (We won't get into doctrine here.) Basically I had to rebuild my foundation on truth that was revealed by the Word and the Holy Spirit not by what  just accepted. (I am not against receiving from preachers but don't try to correct me based on what they say without getting that for yourself. ) I'm at a place where I don't even want to hear the heavy revelations or what to tae the message I got to hear. I want to know what is God speaking to you? We have an opportunity to have a relationship with the creator of the universe. He is speaking. We are too busy doing his work and not sitting at His feet. This year I switched ministries for a while and found myself in a small room doing monitors and weeping before God because I wasn't in a bad place i was just out of place. The core issue was happening again and you can't change people. I had to leave because I wasn't doing what God had told me to do i just took the position to accomplish something and it didn't meet the need anyway in the long run. I returned back and had to find my way again. Out of the flow I had to buckle down again and seek Him again. As the year ended I really realized that people wanted to use your talents for their goals and not just develop what's in you to the Glory of God. I'm not interested in building a throne, ministry or anything else. I'm interested in being obedient to God and doing what he wants me to do as He moves in the earth by His Spirit. Enough of how we've always done it. I want to do it the way God is doing it now.