Last year I missed my high school reunion. I initially wanted to go but made no effort once circumstances beyond my control came into play. Basically I couldn't go and I made no effort to try to. High school is one of those times I think of and just wonder about. There were fun times but overall it was just something I'd rather forget for the most part except some really good people and some good memories. I prayed about it and thought and no I'm not angry but since most of me beginning to go in the spiritual direction in the vision I saw at ten didn't happen to after that I feel it was just a passing through faze. I was running from what God had for me to do but my conscience would not let me do what others did. My senior year I began to look for God beyond my experience and what I had read in the Bible. Not movements, opinions or debates but what God says Biblical Christianity is. This set off a chain of events that went into Audio School, Bible School and some experiences until now. The drastic need to prove myself then has not been in my life for years. I've been quite brash at times too. My strongest ties to that life weakened with my decision to go to Bible College where I was changed completely from a spiritual perspective. Bible College made me face myself for the first time. A lot of weeping and breaking went on as well a pivotal meetings and divine appointments. It's where I learned not to preach but live what you preach. Afterward I found out people can say one thing but when the rubber meets the road they do what they want. People want to play a "spiritual game" but I no longer participate in that. I want God. It's has not been easy and I've learned that my pride can be my worst enemy but it's far from the boy who grew up on Staten Island. The walk with Christ is unpredictable, great, tough, humbling, exciting and many other things. Finding out things and having God remove them from your life is another experience all together. There's still more that must be done but the first step has been completed. Why don't I want to look back? This scripture just explained in a nutshell.
Phillipians 3
13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
14 I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
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